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I have had, a couple of times, to remind myself that people were trying to help. A number of people have told me, at least my Dad is with my Mom now. And that helps, and I hope so too! But a few people have said instead, "Maybe he was meant to go to be with her" or "Maybe he wanted to go to be with her" and that is not helpful, if you can see the distinction. I have several times heard that...and I find it bugs me n a deep, deep level. The thought that maybe there is something after and they are together - that is comforting. The thought of Dad wanting or needing to die is foreign to a degree that makes it offensive.
Worse is the Jehovah's Witnesses tract. See, they must have (I assume) read the obituary in the paper, looked the names up, and sent the thing. They sent it to "The Davidson Family" at my parents' address, which got it forwarded to me, the return address is Newberg, and the letter enclosed says they read of our loss - I assume in the obituaries. Anyway, they say the Bible says you can be reunited with the ones you love in the near future, alive, here on earth, and then go on to include a pamphlet to that effect also, trying to get you to call the JW for more information. This upsets me on so many levels - first, neither of my parents would have welcomed it were they the one still alive and grieving. Second, while I hope there is something good for us all after death, there's limits to what I expect - surely if this were possible or likely, it would've happened a few times by now - and been major news. :P Third, recruiting people who are grieving and hurting in this way just seems slimy and rude. I'm not entirely surprised by the JW doing it, but neither would I have anticipated this degree of tackiness. It really bugged me to get it.
Note that my objection isn't bringing God into the equation; it's the recruiting coupled with the strong implication/almost-promise of the (I believe improbable!) restoration of the people on this earth, in this life. :P Grrrr.
At least I'm annoyed instead of hurt by these two items....
Worse is the Jehovah's Witnesses tract. See, they must have (I assume) read the obituary in the paper, looked the names up, and sent the thing. They sent it to "The Davidson Family" at my parents' address, which got it forwarded to me, the return address is Newberg, and the letter enclosed says they read of our loss - I assume in the obituaries. Anyway, they say the Bible says you can be reunited with the ones you love in the near future, alive, here on earth, and then go on to include a pamphlet to that effect also, trying to get you to call the JW for more information. This upsets me on so many levels - first, neither of my parents would have welcomed it were they the one still alive and grieving. Second, while I hope there is something good for us all after death, there's limits to what I expect - surely if this were possible or likely, it would've happened a few times by now - and been major news. :P Third, recruiting people who are grieving and hurting in this way just seems slimy and rude. I'm not entirely surprised by the JW doing it, but neither would I have anticipated this degree of tackiness. It really bugged me to get it.
Note that my objection isn't bringing God into the equation; it's the recruiting coupled with the strong implication/almost-promise of the (I believe improbable!) restoration of the people on this earth, in this life. :P Grrrr.
At least I'm annoyed instead of hurt by these two items....
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