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Okay, putting these down and seeing reactions is fun. But they ARE spoilerrific. I will spoiler everything up to and including the epilogue. So please do not read the rest of this post if you plan to read this book, and you don't want it spoilered! (As an aside, if you plan to read it and don't want the first quarter or third partly spoilered, you don't want to read the back half of the inside dust jacket on the hardcover, either.)
First, if you aren't familiar with the series, they're our world, historical, but with elemental magic and (later in the series) psychic powers added. The series is based on the premise of retelling old fairy and folk tales. Read The Fire Rose (not listed as part of the series but clearly in the same or similar world) and The Serpent's Shadow. If you like those, check the others out WARILY as those are the only two that are consistently good. And trust me, you can spot which tale it is, but it's also much-altered besides.
We begin with Ninette Dupond who, through a stroke of fortune (brought about by the cat, Thomas, tripping the woman who should have had the part) gets the lead role in the ballet for a matinee showing, impresses reviewers, impresses her rival's current protector/male, and gets fired as a result. She is poor as anything and will be in the street in three days; when that time comes, the cat steals her tickets and gets her, by hook and crook, to England, where he then has her impersonate a Russian ballerina to win the sympathies of a local stage-master, who is also a Master of Air magic. (The cat bespeaks him, so he knows that Ninette's father, presumed deceased since he vanished when his daughter was a babe and left this protector behind, was a Master of Earth. Her mother died a year or so before the book starts.)
Later, we will learn that as a "legacy" she is deserving of their help. Conversely, later after that we will learn that had she not lied about being a famous Russian ballerina (instead of a rising nobody at the Paris opera), they would not have helped her. Later, we'll also learn the cat is her father, locked in that form in a magical battle. He killed the other magician, but he couldn't restore his natural form. We will never learn why he angsted and brought stolen food and money to his wife and babe (stealing the purses in particular, you would think, would be taxing for a cat), but never sought to make contact with any local Masters he might have known (since he had resided in the area long enough to get married and father a baby!) to send word to his particular allies back in his home area in England (where most of the book takes place, since he takes them there when they must run) to come and help his family.
That he didn't bespeak the woman, who couldn't have accepted it and didn't know of his magic, makes sense. But to not send any word to his fellows to help her? Why?
We'll chalk it up to pride for now, and go into the other fun tangles.
Such as impersonating the Russian ballerina. Whom she physically resembles fairly well. Which the cat somehow knows. In spite of never having been to Russia as far as we can tell, and the constant points being made of how people in one area may not know much more than the name of a famous dancer in another area. Who just happens to be, not a human, but an evil earth elemental (a troll) who got away from a summoner several hundred years ago and has been living earth-side ever since, absorbing people and taking their identities, most lately the ballerina. And who happens to have decided it's time for her to move on from Russia and taken a contract closer to England, which contract hears of the impersonator in England, and sends a "what the hell, tell me this is an impersonator" letter to Russia. Thus bringing the earth elemental down in an angry, jealous wrath for its stolen identity being stolen, to be the villain for the rest of the plot.
What. Are. The. Odds? This is not a villain that really would be expected from the actions leading up to it!
She impersonates the ballerina during a storm, as if she has been shipwrecked, making a bit of a sensation. Meanwhile, we meet her first rescuers - a Master of Air, an Air Magician, and Wolf the parrot. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, he claims to be the reincarnated Mozart (his human companions are not sure if he tells the truth or not), and he composes the music for the shows. He objects to "tinkly ballads" or in fact "tinkly" music of any sort. Wolf's the familiar of the Magician (not the Master).
Oh, and the cat stops them by dashing in front of the car, which really could have killed him if they hadn't stopped. SO RISKY compared to approaching calmly with the truth. Along with leaving his daughter lying in the cold wet rain on wet sand for so long she really COULD have become ill or died, since she's half-conscious when they find her. Stupid cat.
Here, the cat tells the rescuers he tried to dissuade her. Later (less than 90 pages later), while the lie is still in force, he will tell them he advised her to do it. They will not blink or notice the discrepancy.
Another mage, a fire mage, joins them. The Air Master sends a message to him and is surprised when he turns up in person, but by the time they get to the Air Master's flat, dinner is ready for both of them. Apparently, the butler can anticipate the Fire Master far better than anyone else. Or the Fire Master warned the butler but not his master. It's never explained. It just happens.
When the fire master first meets our heroine Ninette, he bows over her hand. And the cat sends mentally to all of them, And what am I, an old boot? Anyone have any doubt which fairy tale this is? Anyone think Lackey could get more heavy-handed with it?
In that first conversation, she implies that she has had lovers before (that Nina, the girl she's impersonating, has) to get things from them. And yet later, Jonathon, the fire master, will be appalled at the idea of any man taking advantage of her (he's falling in love, you see) before he learns any of that was a lie.
On page 125, the cat says, of an enemy NO ONE HAS A CLUE WHO IT IS YET because no move has been made against them, "But be prepared, because it is possible an attack will not come from magic, at least not at first." The Air Master says, "Perhaps I should round up a solicitor then." The cat replies "That might be wise." And yet, later, when Ninette is physically attacked and when the real Nina (the Russian dancer's name) appears and spreads the sensational story of the theft of her name through the papers, although they deal with it, they do so without recourse to a solicitor and also without realizing that these problems and the Earth Master they by-then know is coming against them might be IN ANY WAY connected to each other. Lackey: do not set your characters up with clues if they're only going to misplace them in under a hundred pages. One might suspect them of being Mary Sues, since you seem to need a clue as well.
They were told by the cat that the magician who took out Ninette's father didn't survive the duel. (Not quite true, as we later learn; she survived for about a day, and then the cat killed her. But close enough.) Nonetheless, they talk a couple times (page 134 comes to mind) as if they are fighting the same Master. I'm surprised these people survived to help Ninette, it must be because they are too unimportant for anyone competent to go after them, because they have no memory and little logic!
Once the bad lady comes to town, she is absorbing (killing - completely vanishing the bodies of) people semi-regularly, sometimes multiples. I'd guess from what we're shown that 1-2 a day is a good bet. Most are lowlifes. Still, you'd think that would make the news. It never does.
Ninette decides that perhaps the danger they are all sensing (but unable to place) is not directed at her, but at Nigel and Nigel's theater, since he is a Master and at least known. In the very next section (of the same chapter), the bad lady decides to attack the theater. Later, the bad guy sets up shields around various nasty places around town, intending to distract the good guys and trick them into smashing the shields, which would kill what's powering them - in this case, the people in those places, some of them bad people, some of them victims (the despair of the crib girls who are being whored out, for example, so the crib girls would die). The good guys get a Water Master and think of searching for where none of their magics can go (knowing it will be an earth magic area) - after she sets the shields to lure them. (They DO investigate carefully and not kill anyone, at least, by mistake. But still. They don't actually get the resources, or even get shown THINKING of getting them, until her trap is set.)
At one point, they need to get various magic bullets. Silver, cold iron, and blessed lead. The latter pretty well means 'from a church' but none will sell him any. So he hires an urchin to shinny up a drainpipe and steal from a church whose roof badly needs repair, then puts a lot in the repair fund. My reaction ranges from "is it still effective if got by stealing?" to "and the stuff in the roof is actually usable for making bullets?"
By the way, why do Ninette and Nina (the dancer whose name she steals) have such similar names? They are supposed to look similar, what are the odds their names would be similar? It adds to the already-existing confusion created by the other characters calling Ninette Nina - when you go to the real Nina's view, it sometimes takes a moment to realize "oh! the REAL one!"
They all are sure they're under attack somewhere because the street opens up in front of one of the performers and he falls in and breaks his legs - instant sinkhole. Yet, many pages later, they are stunned to realize that perhaps that was the first attack. Um. Once more, the clues fall out the holes Lackey drills in the backs of their heads. (Read this book with a helmet on in case she tries to creep up behind you to try to modify you to think it makes sense!)
They are told what her magic is. Then later they realize it for themselves. Once more, knowledge has fallen out of the characters' heads. I wish I could forget the pain of some of these discontinuities as easily as they forget things!
On page 296, the cat decides to follow the guy who attacked Ninette just before that (sent by the bad guy) to find out who sent him. Whoa, logic! When he finds where the guy lives, he goes back, but decides none of the Masters or Magicians have known or can imagine failure, so he can't trust them to help him, because they'll believe they can't fail. Instead he tells Ninette that he found the attacker, doesn't want the others to know, and is going to investigate and be back. In other words, he knows he can fail so he doesn't need help from those who don't know they could. Why not try telling them? Isn't backup better than none? I should note that after following this guy the cat starts to connect the bad guys. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IN THE BOOK. Keep an eye on the page number.
The cat follows the guy back to the bad earth elemental who had mastered him, who is Nina, and is trapped in her lair behind her shields. But Ninette wakes up instantly, filled with fear and knowing that it's because Thomas (the cat) was scared and in trouble. So she runs off to find him, telling the brownie where she's going so he can tell Ailse who's gone to the pub with a boy. When Ailse gets back since the brownie can't go out. Ailse is to tell the magicians.
Off goes Ninette, she and the brownie know not where, tracking the cat's emotions. She gets there (and is trapped inside the shield) just as the cat tricks the elemental into taking the form of a mouse. But the elemental remembers it's a cat and is ready with a trick when he pounces. (Which is actually VERY CLEVER for a Lackey, especially so close to the end of the book. I was surprised.) Ninette starts shooting the elemental with all the magic bullets acquired during the earlier part of the book, however, and succeeds (with some direction on where to shoot from the cat, when it starts deforming) in killing it. On page 322. (Keep track of that page too.) That turns all its servants loose.
So they run upstairs and barricade them in a room. Digression: the elemental had rented a flat on the first floor and basement of a building. The rest of the building is occupied, as established by the elemental's earlier need to keep them from hearing anything out-of-the-ordinary. This is an hour when many people will be in bed and many others will be home (Ninette was sleeping until the cat got in trouble). And yet...NO MENTION is made of the other occupants, or for that matter how they get into the stairwell (the flat was only one level, its door to the outside of the building) to go upstairs. But they definitely ran upstairs, "down" was owned by the earth elemental's servants, it was a big point. In fact they end up so high that jumping out of the window is not a safe option for them. The lesser elementals are trying to attack them through a barricaded door, but not, say, shredding the other residents apart. They are totally unmentioned here.
Meanwhile, all the Masters and so on show up to rescue them. Okay, how did they know how to get there? Perhaps the shields dropped when the elemental died, but even so, how did they make it there so quickly? Perhaps the Water Master, or the Fire Master, both having some visioning skills, were able to track Ninette's path even though her end destination was under shields. But that would be impressive since she is just a person, and it's in the past. Not like tracking the displacement magic causes, but still, perhaps that's what happened. We can guess, anyway; Lackey never bothers to explain it.
They are saved on page 324. And Jonathon, the fire master, says to Ninette: "If you ever run off like that again, I will -- I will spank you! I swear it!" She giggles hysterically. And then later she lies and says that the cat killed the elemental while it was a mouse, turning the creatures loose, rather than admitting to her part in killing it. In private, the cat asks her why. And she says, because she doesn't want to appear strong and capable to Jonathon. She wants him to look at her as if she is La Augustine (one of the famous dancers at the Paris opera, the one in fact who got Ninette kicked out) rather than as if she is Joan of Arc. "What knight in shining armor likes to turn up to discover the princess has rescued herself and slain the dragon?"
A hint, girl. Next time, curse him for that comment, tell them what really happened, and swear off him. You're an idiot. (And the over-protective daddy who is her cat DOESN'T GIVE AWAY HER LIE. Despite not seeming to want credit when he demands to know why, and not seeming to approve of her answer.)
The epilogue is two pages long. In the first, two irrelevant people have arrived to see the show Ninette stars in, but can't have a box to themselves. They are disturbed by one that is labeled "Reserved for the Cat" and want it, until the usher asks what they expect to be put on a box if the party who took it didn't want that known. They assume they're seated next to royalty, and settle into their shared box. Meanwhile, inside the reserved box is Thomas the cat, with a white cat and some sardines. He had passed word via the various elementals his daughter's allies commanded, and they had found him an intelligent cat who can speak mind-to-mind, a were-cat's daughter, and here she is and they are flirting. I don't think this world had any natural were-creatures before! And would even a transformed human man be really interested in such? And assuming he was, why does that have to be filled in during a single page in the epilogue?
The last page of the epilogue is page 328. Remember those page numbers? Out of a 328 page book, about 30 pages occur after the realization that all their troubles come from one source. What, did someone limit her page count? This thing has some serious pacing problems.
Another random groan quote: "I feel as if I have fallen into a fairy tale!"
One thing I do like in the book is Ailse, the Sensitive they hire to be Ninette's lady's maid. Of course, we see only a bit of her. Which is a pity. For example, she's the one who stuffs the nasty construct into a cast iron pot ("Stand aside! Cold iron!") to contain it (and Ninette seals it closed by stuffing the fire poker through the handles). But this is my favorite Ailse quote:
Jenn, and anyone else who wishes, can laugh at me now. Because yes, I went back through the book to put this together. And now it can go back to the library and torture some other fool.
First, if you aren't familiar with the series, they're our world, historical, but with elemental magic and (later in the series) psychic powers added. The series is based on the premise of retelling old fairy and folk tales. Read The Fire Rose (not listed as part of the series but clearly in the same or similar world) and The Serpent's Shadow. If you like those, check the others out WARILY as those are the only two that are consistently good. And trust me, you can spot which tale it is, but it's also much-altered besides.
We begin with Ninette Dupond who, through a stroke of fortune (brought about by the cat, Thomas, tripping the woman who should have had the part) gets the lead role in the ballet for a matinee showing, impresses reviewers, impresses her rival's current protector/male, and gets fired as a result. She is poor as anything and will be in the street in three days; when that time comes, the cat steals her tickets and gets her, by hook and crook, to England, where he then has her impersonate a Russian ballerina to win the sympathies of a local stage-master, who is also a Master of Air magic. (The cat bespeaks him, so he knows that Ninette's father, presumed deceased since he vanished when his daughter was a babe and left this protector behind, was a Master of Earth. Her mother died a year or so before the book starts.)
Later, we will learn that as a "legacy" she is deserving of their help. Conversely, later after that we will learn that had she not lied about being a famous Russian ballerina (instead of a rising nobody at the Paris opera), they would not have helped her. Later, we'll also learn the cat is her father, locked in that form in a magical battle. He killed the other magician, but he couldn't restore his natural form. We will never learn why he angsted and brought stolen food and money to his wife and babe (stealing the purses in particular, you would think, would be taxing for a cat), but never sought to make contact with any local Masters he might have known (since he had resided in the area long enough to get married and father a baby!) to send word to his particular allies back in his home area in England (where most of the book takes place, since he takes them there when they must run) to come and help his family.
That he didn't bespeak the woman, who couldn't have accepted it and didn't know of his magic, makes sense. But to not send any word to his fellows to help her? Why?
We'll chalk it up to pride for now, and go into the other fun tangles.
Such as impersonating the Russian ballerina. Whom she physically resembles fairly well. Which the cat somehow knows. In spite of never having been to Russia as far as we can tell, and the constant points being made of how people in one area may not know much more than the name of a famous dancer in another area. Who just happens to be, not a human, but an evil earth elemental (a troll) who got away from a summoner several hundred years ago and has been living earth-side ever since, absorbing people and taking their identities, most lately the ballerina. And who happens to have decided it's time for her to move on from Russia and taken a contract closer to England, which contract hears of the impersonator in England, and sends a "what the hell, tell me this is an impersonator" letter to Russia. Thus bringing the earth elemental down in an angry, jealous wrath for its stolen identity being stolen, to be the villain for the rest of the plot.
What. Are. The. Odds? This is not a villain that really would be expected from the actions leading up to it!
She impersonates the ballerina during a storm, as if she has been shipwrecked, making a bit of a sensation. Meanwhile, we meet her first rescuers - a Master of Air, an Air Magician, and Wolf the parrot. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, he claims to be the reincarnated Mozart (his human companions are not sure if he tells the truth or not), and he composes the music for the shows. He objects to "tinkly ballads" or in fact "tinkly" music of any sort. Wolf's the familiar of the Magician (not the Master).
Oh, and the cat stops them by dashing in front of the car, which really could have killed him if they hadn't stopped. SO RISKY compared to approaching calmly with the truth. Along with leaving his daughter lying in the cold wet rain on wet sand for so long she really COULD have become ill or died, since she's half-conscious when they find her. Stupid cat.
Here, the cat tells the rescuers he tried to dissuade her. Later (less than 90 pages later), while the lie is still in force, he will tell them he advised her to do it. They will not blink or notice the discrepancy.
Another mage, a fire mage, joins them. The Air Master sends a message to him and is surprised when he turns up in person, but by the time they get to the Air Master's flat, dinner is ready for both of them. Apparently, the butler can anticipate the Fire Master far better than anyone else. Or the Fire Master warned the butler but not his master. It's never explained. It just happens.
When the fire master first meets our heroine Ninette, he bows over her hand. And the cat sends mentally to all of them, And what am I, an old boot? Anyone have any doubt which fairy tale this is? Anyone think Lackey could get more heavy-handed with it?
In that first conversation, she implies that she has had lovers before (that Nina, the girl she's impersonating, has) to get things from them. And yet later, Jonathon, the fire master, will be appalled at the idea of any man taking advantage of her (he's falling in love, you see) before he learns any of that was a lie.
On page 125, the cat says, of an enemy NO ONE HAS A CLUE WHO IT IS YET because no move has been made against them, "But be prepared, because it is possible an attack will not come from magic, at least not at first." The Air Master says, "Perhaps I should round up a solicitor then." The cat replies "That might be wise." And yet, later, when Ninette is physically attacked and when the real Nina (the Russian dancer's name) appears and spreads the sensational story of the theft of her name through the papers, although they deal with it, they do so without recourse to a solicitor and also without realizing that these problems and the Earth Master they by-then know is coming against them might be IN ANY WAY connected to each other. Lackey: do not set your characters up with clues if they're only going to misplace them in under a hundred pages. One might suspect them of being Mary Sues, since you seem to need a clue as well.
They were told by the cat that the magician who took out Ninette's father didn't survive the duel. (Not quite true, as we later learn; she survived for about a day, and then the cat killed her. But close enough.) Nonetheless, they talk a couple times (page 134 comes to mind) as if they are fighting the same Master. I'm surprised these people survived to help Ninette, it must be because they are too unimportant for anyone competent to go after them, because they have no memory and little logic!
Once the bad lady comes to town, she is absorbing (killing - completely vanishing the bodies of) people semi-regularly, sometimes multiples. I'd guess from what we're shown that 1-2 a day is a good bet. Most are lowlifes. Still, you'd think that would make the news. It never does.
Ninette decides that perhaps the danger they are all sensing (but unable to place) is not directed at her, but at Nigel and Nigel's theater, since he is a Master and at least known. In the very next section (of the same chapter), the bad lady decides to attack the theater. Later, the bad guy sets up shields around various nasty places around town, intending to distract the good guys and trick them into smashing the shields, which would kill what's powering them - in this case, the people in those places, some of them bad people, some of them victims (the despair of the crib girls who are being whored out, for example, so the crib girls would die). The good guys get a Water Master and think of searching for where none of their magics can go (knowing it will be an earth magic area) - after she sets the shields to lure them. (They DO investigate carefully and not kill anyone, at least, by mistake. But still. They don't actually get the resources, or even get shown THINKING of getting them, until her trap is set.)
At one point, they need to get various magic bullets. Silver, cold iron, and blessed lead. The latter pretty well means 'from a church' but none will sell him any. So he hires an urchin to shinny up a drainpipe and steal from a church whose roof badly needs repair, then puts a lot in the repair fund. My reaction ranges from "is it still effective if got by stealing?" to "and the stuff in the roof is actually usable for making bullets?"
By the way, why do Ninette and Nina (the dancer whose name she steals) have such similar names? They are supposed to look similar, what are the odds their names would be similar? It adds to the already-existing confusion created by the other characters calling Ninette Nina - when you go to the real Nina's view, it sometimes takes a moment to realize "oh! the REAL one!"
They all are sure they're under attack somewhere because the street opens up in front of one of the performers and he falls in and breaks his legs - instant sinkhole. Yet, many pages later, they are stunned to realize that perhaps that was the first attack. Um. Once more, the clues fall out the holes Lackey drills in the backs of their heads. (Read this book with a helmet on in case she tries to creep up behind you to try to modify you to think it makes sense!)
They are told what her magic is. Then later they realize it for themselves. Once more, knowledge has fallen out of the characters' heads. I wish I could forget the pain of some of these discontinuities as easily as they forget things!
On page 296, the cat decides to follow the guy who attacked Ninette just before that (sent by the bad guy) to find out who sent him. Whoa, logic! When he finds where the guy lives, he goes back, but decides none of the Masters or Magicians have known or can imagine failure, so he can't trust them to help him, because they'll believe they can't fail. Instead he tells Ninette that he found the attacker, doesn't want the others to know, and is going to investigate and be back. In other words, he knows he can fail so he doesn't need help from those who don't know they could. Why not try telling them? Isn't backup better than none? I should note that after following this guy the cat starts to connect the bad guys. THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IN THE BOOK. Keep an eye on the page number.
The cat follows the guy back to the bad earth elemental who had mastered him, who is Nina, and is trapped in her lair behind her shields. But Ninette wakes up instantly, filled with fear and knowing that it's because Thomas (the cat) was scared and in trouble. So she runs off to find him, telling the brownie where she's going so he can tell Ailse who's gone to the pub with a boy. When Ailse gets back since the brownie can't go out. Ailse is to tell the magicians.
Off goes Ninette, she and the brownie know not where, tracking the cat's emotions. She gets there (and is trapped inside the shield) just as the cat tricks the elemental into taking the form of a mouse. But the elemental remembers it's a cat and is ready with a trick when he pounces. (Which is actually VERY CLEVER for a Lackey, especially so close to the end of the book. I was surprised.) Ninette starts shooting the elemental with all the magic bullets acquired during the earlier part of the book, however, and succeeds (with some direction on where to shoot from the cat, when it starts deforming) in killing it. On page 322. (Keep track of that page too.) That turns all its servants loose.
So they run upstairs and barricade them in a room. Digression: the elemental had rented a flat on the first floor and basement of a building. The rest of the building is occupied, as established by the elemental's earlier need to keep them from hearing anything out-of-the-ordinary. This is an hour when many people will be in bed and many others will be home (Ninette was sleeping until the cat got in trouble). And yet...NO MENTION is made of the other occupants, or for that matter how they get into the stairwell (the flat was only one level, its door to the outside of the building) to go upstairs. But they definitely ran upstairs, "down" was owned by the earth elemental's servants, it was a big point. In fact they end up so high that jumping out of the window is not a safe option for them. The lesser elementals are trying to attack them through a barricaded door, but not, say, shredding the other residents apart. They are totally unmentioned here.
Meanwhile, all the Masters and so on show up to rescue them. Okay, how did they know how to get there? Perhaps the shields dropped when the elemental died, but even so, how did they make it there so quickly? Perhaps the Water Master, or the Fire Master, both having some visioning skills, were able to track Ninette's path even though her end destination was under shields. But that would be impressive since she is just a person, and it's in the past. Not like tracking the displacement magic causes, but still, perhaps that's what happened. We can guess, anyway; Lackey never bothers to explain it.
They are saved on page 324. And Jonathon, the fire master, says to Ninette: "If you ever run off like that again, I will -- I will spank you! I swear it!" She giggles hysterically. And then later she lies and says that the cat killed the elemental while it was a mouse, turning the creatures loose, rather than admitting to her part in killing it. In private, the cat asks her why. And she says, because she doesn't want to appear strong and capable to Jonathon. She wants him to look at her as if she is La Augustine (one of the famous dancers at the Paris opera, the one in fact who got Ninette kicked out) rather than as if she is Joan of Arc. "What knight in shining armor likes to turn up to discover the princess has rescued herself and slain the dragon?"
A hint, girl. Next time, curse him for that comment, tell them what really happened, and swear off him. You're an idiot. (And the over-protective daddy who is her cat DOESN'T GIVE AWAY HER LIE. Despite not seeming to want credit when he demands to know why, and not seeming to approve of her answer.)
The epilogue is two pages long. In the first, two irrelevant people have arrived to see the show Ninette stars in, but can't have a box to themselves. They are disturbed by one that is labeled "Reserved for the Cat" and want it, until the usher asks what they expect to be put on a box if the party who took it didn't want that known. They assume they're seated next to royalty, and settle into their shared box. Meanwhile, inside the reserved box is Thomas the cat, with a white cat and some sardines. He had passed word via the various elementals his daughter's allies commanded, and they had found him an intelligent cat who can speak mind-to-mind, a were-cat's daughter, and here she is and they are flirting. I don't think this world had any natural were-creatures before! And would even a transformed human man be really interested in such? And assuming he was, why does that have to be filled in during a single page in the epilogue?
The last page of the epilogue is page 328. Remember those page numbers? Out of a 328 page book, about 30 pages occur after the realization that all their troubles come from one source. What, did someone limit her page count? This thing has some serious pacing problems.
Another random groan quote: "I feel as if I have fallen into a fairy tale!"
One thing I do like in the book is Ailse, the Sensitive they hire to be Ninette's lady's maid. Of course, we see only a bit of her. Which is a pity. For example, she's the one who stuffs the nasty construct into a cast iron pot ("Stand aside! Cold iron!") to contain it (and Ninette seals it closed by stuffing the fire poker through the handles). But this is my favorite Ailse quote:
"She wants to teach me to shoot!" Ninette burst out, her cheeks very pink now. "I think this would be a very good idea!"
"Shoot?" Jonathon exclaimed, startled. "You mean, a firearm?"
Ailse glared at him. "No, a knittin' needle, ye gurt booby!"
Jenn, and anyone else who wishes, can laugh at me now. Because yes, I went back through the book to put this together. And now it can go back to the library and torture some other fool.
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And... yeah, Lackey's really needed editors for a while now. Well, editors who will actually edit.
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I think Jenn really enjoyed my rantings. Especially since, in IM, each new horror was usually preceded by some variation of:
...
...
!!!!
LACKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
At one point there was a "feed her to the pigs!" "but what she writes has already come out the other end of that process!" exchange.
Even for Lackey, this one was really bad.